ups and downs

end

siewmei21 — Mon, 02 Nov 2009 04:27:01 +0000

school will be ending soon.

memories will remain forever.

sunshine

siewmei21 — Mon, 02 Nov 2009 04:21:36 +0000

i skipped school today.woke up at 3.45 am feeling giddy .went to toilet and brush my teeth,splashed alot of cold water onto my face and started studying chemistry.well, thinking about this routine,i started waking up early since from the very beginning of the year.i think, next time i don’t need an alarm clock,instead, i have my own biological clock.

time passes like a jet fighter ( i hope it’s a hot air balloon) but you know,the reality is, 17 days more to doomsday.i didn’t put as much hardwork as my friends. result often reflects how much effort we put in,and i will study as hard as i could for these remaining days.

will i make it to the university?

merry go round

siewmei21 — Fri, 16 Oct 2009 05:50:08 +0000

if only merry go round the world exists……

Went to PA tuition at 9.30 am today.Szu Xin’s dad fetched me there. Quite hungry during the class as I only had few pieces of Oreo before going to the class. My car went crazy ;the compressor of the aircond burnt.Need about RM 300 to repair it. Sigh,if only I have money photostat machine ..hmm. Well tuition was okay today.Just that Miss Cheong mentioned something about entrance to the university.My heart was beating so fast that time.Seft conflict was so overwhelming ;

will I make it to uni? i want 3.8 and above!how if all my friends managed to get into university and I am excluded?

sigh .

sigh.

and sigh.

I admit,I am not putting extraordinary hardwork.If I have life until the age of 80, then I have spent 1/4 of my life studying .People have been calling me drama queen, drama whatever whatever,nerd,geek etc etc,but I don’t mind because I don’t lose anything at all.I only wish to study like how I want to be,achieve my dreams,thats it.

Today, 16th of October is my boyfriend’s birthday.Baby, happy birthday.I am sorry because I couldn’t celebrate with you .I might not the nearest to you right now, but my heart does.I love you so much.

I am still thinking.

siewmei21 — Wed, 14 Oct 2009 03:10:42 +0000

Less than 30 days I will be sitting for my major exams that determine my path of life. I am very very scared, and my feeling cannot be described.Frankly speaking, I did not put as much hardwork as the others and I am regretting for the times that I have wasted just like that.Time is golden,time is really gold, cannot be replaced.There’s nothing that I can do except working extremely hard in the next coming 30 days.

I just moved to a new place that is quite far from my previous house.It’s quite frustrating to drive such distance to reach a particular place and I am adapting to it.It’s so quite over here and 100% suitable for studying.I skipped school today.I actually woke up at 4 am , studied until 5.30 am ,had a cup of milk and then I couldn’t stand the headache,I went to bed. I had a terrible shock when I took out the milk from the refrigerator.One very big and fat cockcroach crawling out on the cabinet. Maybe that’s why I had terrible headache after that, knncb betul lah.

I am now alone here in such unfamiliar place.I feel loneliness.Boyfriend went to school.Talking about my boyfriend,his birthday is coming in another two days time.It has been two weeks more since our visit to Cameron Highlands.I miss you dear.I know you’re struggling like me too, STPM is really so near.

My trial result is so terrible. But trial is not the element that is going to determine my STPM.And I will never,never give up no matter what obstacles going to hit me.I went through this year not with my best of health condition, but I maintained my result .And now, I am almost normal.Thanks God for the gift.

I love my mother.

post-trial

siewmei21 — Mon, 14 Sep 2009 12:45:24 +0000

After much struggling for three weeks,trial finally came to an end. And yeah,this is my new journal .Actually I have started a new blog in blogspot.com before,but since someone told me wordpress is much better,so I think I am going to keep wordpress going on. One more, I don’t think blogging something restricted anymore,and everyone has the right to blog ,to express . And I don’t want people to say that I hibernate for this two years because I am not.

I don’t deny I spent most of my time studying and doing homework ,and I don’t mind people calling me a nerd at all.Everyone is different ,everyone has their own way of thinking and define life and everyone sets a goal before doing something.It depends on you how you want to live your life,and you are just a tiny part of the world, I cannot change other people’s attitude as how I wanted to.Nobody likes to be judged, but the more you don’t want a thing to happen,the more it likely to be happen.This is what I am experiencing this one and half year.I know,life isn’t easy and it is still a long way to go.

My life is mine,and I got my rights to live my life and how I want it to be.But I must remember I am not the only one who lives in this world, but I am just a very,very tiny dot. I want to live, I want to experience because life is a gift.Everyone around me is a gift . They made my life beautiful and for people who dislike me, I apologise that I have made your life miserable ..but ,for me,they made me live even stronger,and ….when I am silence,doesn’t mean that I am wrong or you are right,it’s just as simple as, silence is golden and God knows what am I doing.

After these three weeks, finally I can put my focus for the next coming exam ,STPM. I will work really hard to obtain what I want, and I don’t mind what kind of grades I will get for Trial as I know I have worked hard for it.I might not be as smart as other students, but I did put effort.I don’t mind how the teachers critize me ,because I know myself the best,my mother knows it and..most importantly what I get reflects my effort.If I couldn’t get what I aimed for,I still got time to improve .

Hello world!

siewmei21 — Mon, 14 Sep 2009 12:19:01 +0000

Welcome to WordPress.com. This is your first post. Edit or delete it and start blogging!